Anti Prince Charming

Ladies, I apologize for this one. I care about and appreciate all of you. However, if you are in a relationship this probably isn’t the post for you. Skip this one. If you are a man, skip this post. I hate to rag on men, I really do… however, they are all SO predictable. So cheers ladies, this one is to the men who suck ASS.

Let me tell you a little story. Once upon a time there was an intelligent, beautiful, driven, caring, funny, independent young woman. Her name? Ashley Rachelle Rathbone. (I know, shocker right?) Ashley was having a good time living her very single, very content life. When all of the sudden, a demon from the underworld (for this post we will refer to him as anti prince charming) appeared. He seemed like Prince Charming so much that she didn’t even see the word anti.

What made this man seem like Prince Charming? He called her, on the PHONE. (In this day and age? CRAZY) He called her multiple times a week, he just enjoyed talking to her and learning about her. He planned a facetime date for the two of them since he lived so far away. He planned a real date for the two of them that he was going to drive almost 7 HOURS to take her on. She was smitten. He was an engineer, extremely handsome, intelligent, and a man who finally seemed like an equal to her.

Too bad she didn’t realize that life isn’t a fairytale. As much as she hates to admit it about herself, she is a hopeless romantic. She thought about the date all the time, daydreaming about how it would go. Prince Charming ended up cancelling the date that had been written on her calendar for a month TWO DAYS beforehand. (I know you may be thinking “Ashley, you cancel dates all the time. Don’t be a hypocrite." - The dates I canceled were not with men who I talked to on the phone multiple nights a week and had zoom dates with. Thank you VERY much.)

"Why did he cancel the date, Ashley?" "He seemed great, he must have had a good reason." PLOT TWIST - this is the moment Ashley realizes that he is actually ANTI Prince Charming. While he SEEMED amazing, it was all a show.

In the first paragraph I said that men are predictable. I say that because this is a show that they all put on. (Anti Prince Charming just did it better than all the others, thus sweet Ashley did not realize it was the show) Ladies, anything a man says in the beginning of a relationship (and I use the word relationship lightly here, as I did not yet have one with this man) is a show he is putting on to get one thing - sex.

“It’s verbal foreplay. . . It’s a sales pitch. . . If he buys you dinner and sends flowers, he’s balancing a ball on his nose. . . [It’s] all being done for the same reason: to get a reward. If he wants the ‘treat,’ he has to do the ‘trick.’” Just to quote my by far favorite book Why Men Love Bitches by Sherry Argov.

Anti Prince charming called, texted, zoomed, complemented, and said he would drive 7 hours to "wine and dine" me… he was just balancing the ball on his nose EXTREMELY well. Ashley, you technically still haven’t explained why exactly the date was cancelled. Ladies, ladies, do not fret. I am getting there right now. He cancelled because I said that I would not be down to have casual sex. I said no sex, therefore I got no first date.

Ladies, here is the thing... I am not against casual sex. Have all the sex you want with whoever you want. I myself have had my fair share of casual sex. However, I wanted to see how he would react. I wanted to see if he would be willing to wait a couple of dates for it. I wanted to see if his interest was genuine and real, not just physical. I got my DAMN answer.

Ladies, we deserve better. We deserve men who want more from us than casual sex. We deserve more, because we bring WAY more to the table than just our bodies. I bring a lot to the table, and honestly this isn’t my loss. It is his loss. He failed the test…. He proved that he was balancing the ball on his nose. He was doing whatever he needed to do to get the PUSSY.

This is PREDICTABLE male behavior. It is so sad that we as women have to protect ourselves from future heartache by testing men. It is ridiculous that we have to withhold sex when we want it just as bad as they do, just to make sure that isn’t the ONLY reason for their interest. I’m so tired of the BULLSHIT. Why slide into my DMs, and mess with my happy life for your own sick sex games? Why waste a month of my life with phone calls to cancel on me because you aren’t going to get laid at the end of the (FIRST) date?

Boss Ass Bitches, protect your damn selves. There is no such thing as Prince Charming.

XOXO,

Ashley Rathbone